Latest Tweets:

officialunitedstates:

FACT OF THE DAY:  mars is called the red planet because during the cold war it sided with the communists

(via covocal)

sunnyblu:

Pidgey 

sunnyblu:

Pidgey 

(via castielwinchestah)

lifewithanorwegianfjord:

this is mesmerizing. 

lifewithanorwegianfjord:

this is mesmerizing. 

(Source: carryonmywaywardstirrup, via covocal)

vinebox:

Watching Pokémon on Saturday mornings as a kid

(via sowhatelseisblu)

matt-douchene:

do u ever do something mildly impolite like not give a nice goodbye or not hold a door and spend the rest of the day thinking about it

(via dazedclub)

oh-no-nicola:

hugefkingnerd:

lesbeeanmovie:

greencarnations:

cinematicsymphony:

This is so accurate. At school, we literally have children who will watch our facial expressions to see if them falling is as bad as they think it might be.

CORRECT CHILD INJURY PROCEDURE:

  • do not react. at the most, maybe wince and go “ooooh”
  • go over to the child to assess panic level and severity of injury
  • if they’re like, dying, remain calm, but they’re probably not.
  • look them in the eye and ask, “you okay?” they will nod. possibly all teary-eyed. then ask, “are we gonna need to cut it off?”
  • the child is thrown off. if they giggle, you’re in the money. if they do not, put a bandaid on and do some sympathetic patting. they are probably a little teary. let the sad little bug sit out for a minute. they will quickly get bored.
  • works every time

"sad little bug" is the cutest and most accurate term ive heard used to describe a child because sometimes bugs are kinda super cute sometimes bugs are really fucking annoying and sometimes bugs are downright TERRIFYING

My automatic response is to laugh a little and ask if they’re ok.
Usually with this, if they’re not really hurt, they’ll just pick themselves up and keep going, probably laughing a little too.
If they are really hurt they’ll kind of sit there and be like “no.” 
at which point you fix the kid up.

Always always ask them if you need to cut it off

It’s the only way

(Source: kaliskadyami)

sassypotter:

allabitofablur:

ellanarosetw:

theladymonsters:

superbmarksman:

i always end up thinking about the economic damage in superhero movies

make a movie.

the movie would be set entirely in the office of one over-worked insurance agent answering phone calls and in the window behind him we see various Super Heroes destroying things

Cast Amy Poehler

(via itscauseyoureafuckinelf)

surprisebitch:

this show seriously tackles all issues

(Source: kimagreggs, via millajovobitch)

radhomo:

my new favorite color

radhomo:

my new favorite color

(via covocal)

febricant:

adhoption:

river-b:

motherfuckinoedipus:

abnels:

memeguy-com:

You win this round cheese

actually that is a rectangle cheese

[oxford comma laughing in the distance]

[vocative comma wondering what oxford comma thinks it’s doing here]

I already reblogged this for the pun but I’m reblogging again for the sick punctuation banter

it’s wild times on tumblr tonight

febricant:

adhoption:

river-b:

motherfuckinoedipus:

abnels:

memeguy-com:

You win this round cheese

actually that is a rectangle cheese

[oxford comma laughing in the distance]

[vocative comma wondering what oxford comma thinks it’s doing here]

I already reblogged this for the pun but I’m reblogging again for the sick punctuation banter

it’s wild times on tumblr tonight

(via oh-no-nicola)

poyzn:

Quick and simple lifehacks.

(via listenfivestenistalking)

tacoooolol:

rendigo:

tastefullyoffensive:

"She never thought the toilet paper roll would fight back." [jesst]

whatwhat are ferrets even MADE of?????

Happiness.

tacoooolol:

rendigo:

tastefullyoffensive:

"She never thought the toilet paper roll would fight back." [jesst]

what
what are ferrets even MADE of?????

Happiness.

(via listenfivestenistalking)

skittleoakley:

Daughter tells her Dad he’s going to be a Grandpa [x]

(via castlefreak005)

harbi-doll:

callmeoutis:

i was ready to just scroll past like “haha grammar humor” but then it was weird al and i,

Weird Al….

(Source: iraffiruse, via castlefreak005)